 How Our Mind & Body Shapes Us
“We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are.” — Rabbi Shemuel ben Nachmani, as quoted in the Talmudic tractate Berakhot When I introduce myself as a therapist to others, not only does it immediately make the conversation awkward, but I also get people asking “ do you ask everyone about their mothers? Are you analyzing me?” The answer: probably not. There’s a 90% chance I’m longing for the comfort of my sweatpants and thinking about what I’ll eat next. So, to answer the original question- yes. Yes, I do often ask about childhood experiences. It’s not that I want to be that stereotypical therapist, however with a combination of years of clinical experience and research, it has become so apparent that how we are raised, our environment and how we are responded to absolutely affects our abilities to regulate and make sense of our experiences. To fully appreciate the why, let us talk about the brain. “Pattern Matching” is something our brains do without our awareness. With every experience, our brain searches for matches that fit experiences or patterns already stored in our memory. Our brain links past with present, determining in just a blip of time if the experience is good, bad, or in the event of no matches, a new neural network is built. The brain uses minimal amount of searching when matching, which not only lead us prone to jump to conclusions, make assumptions, but also gives us this fun ability: So what does this mean for those of us who are roaming around the world and interacting with others? Well, our nervous system shapes our brain as our brain shapes our nervous system. These systems are fluid in their communication, constantly operating on an unconscious level of seeking out threat and looking for safety. Our brain looks for what/how things are is through comparing the past to the present. When there is an early trauma in our lives ( keeping in mind trauma isn’t always what we think, it expands far beyond the battlefield, car crashes and assaults) this results in our brain making an extra strong connection to match with for the future. As our brain uses minimal cues to make up its mind, we are prone to make assumptions based off experiences from the past and should these experiences mimic a traumatic past experience ( feeling, sensation, etc), our brain will immediately kick into survival mode, bypassing the parts of our brain that do logical and systematic thinking. By receiving professional help- especially a “trauma informed” therapist- can help to rewire and retrain your brain and emotional system through understanding how it works. Our brains are remarkable, constantly changing and forever investing in our own well-being. I would encourage anyone reading this to take a moment to appreciate what that 3 pound blob of electrical networks does, from keeping us alive to enjoying music to all of the in between. Thanks, brain! How Our Mind & Body Shapes Us “We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are.” — Rabbi Shemuel ben Nachmani, as quoted in the Talmudic tractate Berakhot When I introduce myself as a therapist to others, not only does it immediately make the conversation awkward, but I also get people asking “ do you ask everyone about their mothers? Are you analyzing me?” The answer: probably not. There’s a 90% chance I’m longing for the comfort of my sweatpants and thinking about what I’ll eat next. So, to answer the original question- yes. Yes, I do often ask about childhood experiences. It’s not that I want to be that stereotypical therapist, however with a combination of years of clinical experience and research, it has become so apparent that how we are raised, our environment and how we are responded to absolutely affects our abilities to regulate and make sense of our experiences. To fully appreciate the why, let us talk about the brain. “Pattern Matching” is something our brains do without our awareness. With every experience, our brain searches for matches that fit experiences or patterns already stored in our memory. Our brain links past with present, determining in just a blip of time if the experience is good, bad, or in the event of no matches, a new neural network is built. The brain uses minimal amount of searching when matching, which not only lead us prone to jump to conclusions, make assumptions, but also gives us this fun ability: So what does this mean for those of us who are roaming around the world and interacting with others? Well, our nervous system shapes our brain as our brain shapes our nervous system. These systems are fluid in their communication, constantly operating on an unconscious level of seeking out threat and looking for safety. Our brain looks for what/how things are is through comparing the past to the present. When there is an early trauma in our lives ( keeping in mind trauma isn’t always what we think, it expands far beyond the battlefield, car crashes and assaults) this results in our brain making an extra strong connection to match with for the future. As our brain uses minimal cues to make up its mind, we are prone to make assumptions based off experiences from the past and should these experiences mimic a traumatic past experience ( feeling, sensation, etc), our brain will immediately kick into survival mode, bypassing the parts of our brain that do logical and systematic thinking. By receiving professional help- especially a “trauma informed” therapist- can help to rewire and retrain your brain and emotional system through understanding how it works. Our brains are remarkable, constantly changing and forever investing in our own well-being. I would encourage anyone reading this to take a moment to appreciate what that 3 pound blob of electrical networks does, from keeping us alive to enjoying music to all of the in between. Thanks, brain!
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